We are limited and that is good
Is death an enemy or a friend? (Part 3)
We were created. That means we are finite creatures. Sometimes we assume that, as God makes us new, we will become limitless or all-knowing. We say things like, “When I get to heaven, God will answer all my questions.” I don’t think that’s true. J. Todd Billings in his book Rejoicing in Lament, writes, “Even in the final chapter, we will still be creatures, and God will be God. Only God will know God as God. We will still be worshiping the Triune God as the illuminating source of all light and life, a mystery beyond ourselves.”1
Kelly M. Kapic in his bookYou’re Only Human, makes a helpful distinction: creatureliness is not sin2 We keep asking for forgiveness for being limited but limitation itself is not evil. It is how we were designed.
In Genesis 3, God guards the way to the “tree of life” not because he does not want us to live, but because the only way we can live is by preserving our creatureliness. If we try to become God, we come to our ruin. Preserving our humanity, including our limitations, is a part of God’s way of saving our lives.
Mike and I just made it through Mother’s Day — the day our daughter died two years ago. Grieving the death of a child can put strain on your marriage because you both need comfort, but there are times you have little to offer each other. I wish Mike could have gone through the anniversary of the hardest day of his life not having to think about honoring me as a mother. I’m really impressed by Mike, though, because he did love me well yesterday, and he acknowledged his limits. Often, in the last two years, we have had to tell each other that we can’t carry each other’s grief while carrying our own. It’s too heavy. We need God. And we need the wider network of support that God has given us. We can hold each other, but we can’t be God to each other.
This is really hard to acknowledge, and yet, embracing our limits is what keeps our marriage and friendship strong. Having limitations is how God designed us, and he designed us beautifully.
And the Lord God said, “The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever.” So the Lord God banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken. After he drove the man out, he placed on the east side of the Garden of Eden cherubim and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to guard the way to the tree of life.
– Genesis 3:22-24
J. Todd. Billings. Rejoicing in Lament: Wrestling with Incurable Cancer & Life in Christ. (Grand Rapids, Michigan: Brazos Press, 2015), 187.
Kelly M. Kapic, You’re Only Human: How Your Limits Reflect God’s Design and Why That’s Good News (Grand Rapids, MI: Brazos Press, 2022), 12.
Such strong and wise words from such unimaginable loss.. "..we can’t carry each other’s grief while carrying our own. It’s too heavy. We need God. And we need the wider network of support that God has given us. We can hold each other, but we can’t be God to each other." Love you!